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Tale of the Tape -- Cornell vs. The Real World

Idiots on the Lake

Issue date: 5/3/00 Section: Features
"And so it has come to this...In our last official act as the Idiots we have chosen to compare life as we second years currently know it to the life that awaits us in a scant few months. Ithaca may seem small to us now, and the walls of Sage may appear to be closing in around us, but are we truly worse off now than we will be once we re-enter the workforce? Let's see how the two ways of life stack up against the Tale of the Tape:"

Business School Real World

CASH FLOW
Business School: Signing bonus can only go so far
Real World: "Wow, this bi-weekly paycheck thing is nice!"
Advantage: Real World

WORK LEVEL
Business School: Classes start at 2:55. Hit couches at 2:00 to read over 50 pages of cases with a bottle of soda and a tin of Kodiak
Real World: Work starts at the unreasonable hour of 9am (a time currently reserved for sleep or golf) and ends when it is too dark to play golf
Advantage: Business School

DRIVE FOR FIVE
Business School: Bettering youself and the Johnson School at all costs
Real World: Leaving work early to catch the early SportsCenter
Advantage: Business School

SOCIAL OUTLETS
Business School: Golf, Atrium, Palms, dock, bowling, Palms. That's about it.
Real World: Assuming you're not going to KC, you should have a myriad of choices.
Advantage: Real World

TALENT
Business School: Wading Pool (with Lifeguards)
Real World: Deep Ocean, but be careful not to be caught fishing off the company pier.
Advantage: Real World

FOOD
Business School: Lunch: Pearls Dinner: Joes Late Night: Hot Truck, Shortstop, State Street Diner
Real World: Lunch: Pick a deli, any deli Dinner: Pick a restaurant, any restaurant Late Night: "Hey! Sausage Man!"
Advantage: Real World

GROVELLING
Business School: Prof. Open door policy allows for a jump from 9.5 to 10 on a quiz worth .72% of your final grade
Real World: Wall Street frowns upon whiny MBA grads looking for credit
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